kinkles

hot.

2008-11-25T05:40:57Z

kinklez @ 2008-10-01T23:39:00

2008-10-02T04:40:30Z

well. i decided that since i can't switch back to a basic account i'd just use one of the old lj names i made and never used

SINCE APPARENTLY NEW ACCOUNTS ARE AUTOMATICALLY PLUS

so

qtk8ee

add me pls.

kinklez @ 2008-10-01T01:12:00

2008-10-01T06:12:51Z

dear lj friends,

if you happen to chance upon the hideous state my livejournal is currently in, know that i am working on fixing it and that it is SUPPOSED to be pretty. see: http://nables.livejournal.com

thank you for your time.

kinklez @ 2008-09-30T17:53:00

2008-09-30T22:56:00Z

i am going to post a poem as an example of what is in mine and edward's book.

i wrote this poem.

it is titled..

old ladies.

or something.

the old women at work are so cute,
though there can be an occasional brute,
on the whole, you'll never want to shoot,
these sweet ladies buying their fruit.

for example, one lady was paying,
and she left my line, distressed, saying,
"i forgot to get brats, silly me,"
ten minutes later, back was she.

another old woman one time,
she was buying a half-eaten lime,
not really i'm making that up,
but wouldn't that just fill your cup?

by: kaitlyn kinkles garr.

kinklez @ 2008-09-30T01:54:00

2008-09-30T06:56:04Z

i am going to download the harry potter books on tape so i can listen to them as i sleep as i once did.

too bad it is going to take too long for me to listen to them tonight. because of this, i am crying.

kinklez @ 2008-09-28T01:22:00

2008-09-28T06:27:49Z

i want to become a master livejournal layout maker.

unfortunately i forgot everything i once knew about it.

eddie and i made a book. and we self-published it on lulu.com. and it should be coming in the mail next week and i am SO EXCITED!!!!!!!!11111111111 YEAH!!!!!!!111111

it's not like we're trying to sell it or anything so don't judge us. it is for private use only!!!

frankie's got a girlfriend now. it's so weird. they talk on the phone all night and stuff. HE'S IN EIGHTH GRADE NOW. AND HE ASKED HER OUT. IT'S SO WEIRD!!!!!!!!!11

ISN'T HE ADORABLE.

i don't know what else. but i'm going to bed now since i have to work at 7 in the morning. WHICH I HATE DOING. GOD!!!!!!!!!1

oh well.

kinklez @ 2008-09-25T21:46:00

2008-09-26T02:46:39Z

http://www.youtube.com
/watch?v=-26bRZEedZg

yeeeeeeeeeeeeahhhhhhhhh

kinklez @ 2008-09-23T23:21:00

2008-09-24T04:30:59Z

today, edward had me convinced that my dad sold me to him for $450.

obviously i didn't believe him at first, but he just kept insisting and insisting until i just started questioning whether it could really be true. he was so SERIOUS, and i said i was going to ask my dad about it and he seemed genuinely concerned, all "no, kaity, don't, i promised i wouldn't tell you."

BUT IT WAS ALL A JOKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

it seemed so real though because i was trying to guess how much he paid for me and i was like "$100." and eddie said "higher." and i said "500." and he said "lower." so it seemed like he already knew the price and everything like it was TRUE but it wasn't so shut up i'm sorry i'm stupid.

eddie bought this book called haunted by chuck palahniuk and there is this fucking gross story about a guy who used the sucking filter thing in the bottom of a swimming pool to masturbate. because he'd sit on it and it'd suck his butt and feel good. and one day he was doing it and he orgasmed (which, by the way, after he did it he always swam around and collected the globs of sperm so that his sister wouldn't get pregnant from them) and he tried to swim up because he was running out of air, but he couldn't because he was stuck. so he kicked off and he noticed this "snake" was clamped on to his butthole. and he said the snake was chalky white and veiny and it was bleeding.

and he said as he more closely observed the snake, he noticed that it had corn in it and peas and a big yellow pill like the ones horses take. then he realized that HE had taken that pill and realized that the filter had just sucked his intestine out of him. but he was running out of air so he had to just swim up and have even MORE of it pull out so he could breathe. but it wouldn't budge so he just chewed off his nasty shit-filled intestine. and swam out and then he just had to explain himself to his parents.

his sister went swimming in the pool afterwards and got pregnant.

it's not a true story, but good lord almighty is it disgusting.

taylor's halloween costume.

not really we didn't buy it or anything. but that might be it.

OHHHHHHH. taylor, edward and i decided that for the harry potter premiere, instead of dressing up as characters we are going to buy M&M suits, stuff them with pillows so we are round, spray paint them the appropriate colors and go as the quidditch balls. well, taylor would be a broomstick. but i would be the quaffle and edward would be the snitch and ... TESSA AND ZACH!?!??! would be the bludgers. we were also thinking someone could wear a hula hoop on their head and be a goal post but i think that might obstruct somebody else's view of the movie.

I AM SO EXCITED!!!!!!!!!1

anyway, i am going to take a shit and i expect a multitude of comments when i return.

:)!!

kinklez @ 2008-09-21T18:32:00

2008-09-21T23:35:48Z

pib in the sink

the house i want edward and i to live in!!!

a purse i crocheted for my mommy

so anyway. here are some of my fave wedding dresses. but. HOW DO YOU GUYS FEEL ABOUT A WEDDING DRESS THAT HAS COLOR IN IT? i will show two that i like.

THIS one has color

this one, but in a different color

i really like dis one

and dis one

this one is probably my favorite though.

OPINIONS PLS!!

kinklez @ 2008-09-20T15:12:00

2008-09-20T20:17:44Z

yesterday, brisingr came out, and book world was having a party at 11pm, but edward had to work, so i thought i'd go with taylor.

so we didn't go until like 11:50 because we didn't want to be the first ones there and really we just wanted to get the book and leave, and taylor got all dressed up thinking she'd meet the nerd of her dreams, and we got there and just.

aldsmgoasdgm.

with taylor and i, there were 8 people total.

it was SO SAD. the whole bookstore was decorated, the cashiers were dressed up and there was a full pan of brownies, two full two liters of soda, a full bowl of chips and a full plate of cookies. three of the people were under the age of 12, and it was just so embarrassing. i was mortified.

and there was a trivia quiz to fill out so i filled one out, confident in my knowledge of the series.

so then, after the cashiers DOUBLE CHECKED TO MAKE SURE IT WAS MIDNIGHT, like there was a HUGE LONG LINE and a HUGE COUNTDOWN IN ANTICIPATION, they started selling the books. so i got up there and was like "what do i do with this quiz?" and she said "well, we can give you the answer key if you want to see if you got the questions right, but there's no prize..."

WHAT?????????///////// i filled out that quiz for NOTHING. NOTHING!!!!!!

and then someone asked them how long they were going to stay open and they said "until about 1:30 if people keep coming."

NO ONE WAS THERE!!!!!!!!!

it was so sad and pathetic and humiliating. good thing i was third in line so i could get out of there fast!

in other news, eddie is so high maintenance and it takes him like 2 hours to get out of bed and i get SO FRUSTRATED and i want to pull his hair out and he's like "rub my back" so i rub his back and he's like "rub my hair" so i rub his hair and he's like "rub my ENTIRE BODY" so i do it and the cycle just repeats itself everyday where he won't get up until his entire body has been rubbed and everyday he says "you never rub me" and I DO IT EVERY DAY, AHH!!!!!!!!!1111111111111111

kinklez @ 2008-09-18T15:44:00

2008-09-18T20:53:24Z

eddie and i got this neato little tiny eeny digital camera/webcam that takes pretty bad quality pictures, but it's still fun to use. i mean, i can't really take any pictures in the dark because it doesn't have flash, SHUT UP IT ONLY COST TWELVE DOLLARS, but it's still neat.

p. neat.

and i can make silent videos cause i don't have a microphone, but it's still fun.

SO THERE!!!!!!!!!1111111111111

kinklez @ 2008-09-16T00:18:00

2008-09-16T05:21:01Z

from left to right, i THINK it's:

nid, spam, jaki, chantel, me, eddie, tessa, taylor, mommy, frankie. i was going to do edward's groomsmen, which would probably be like. his brother, his bff, frankie .. and i don't know. zach maybe???////// WE HAVE TO HAVE THE SAME NUMBER OF BRIDESMAIDS AND GROOMSMEN OR IT'S UNSYMMETRICAL. anyway i was going to do groomsmen but they're boring because all the tuxes are the same.

you can see how bored i get.

edward and i got new debit cards today and they are pretty. i activated them but i can't figure out how to change the pin so i am always going to forget mine. i know it.

we saw burn after reading and it was really funny. today i made edward watch high school musical and i remembered when we tried to learn the dance at the end and i judged us. we also watched being john malkovich which was a good/weird movie.

AND.. what else. OH! my mommy got a german shepard puppy. they named it ike and he is SO CUTE I WANT IT. of course they wait until after i move out to get a dog, and a big screen tv, and free long distance. GOD! WHY!

i can't wait until edward and i get a house where we can have a dog. probably won't be until after i graduate, but whatever. i want to get a good job that pays enough so that we can live comfortably and get stuff that we want and be able to spend money on groceries without grimacing at the cost. AND I WANT A REALLY NICE HOUSE. i already picked one out on main street. it's white and i THINK it's three stories and it has a tower on one side. it's pretty. of course we'll never live there, but it's nice to dream.

no one ever updates or anything and no one cares about my boredom.

kinklez @ 2008-09-15T02:53:00

2008-09-15T07:54:53Z

here is my wedding plan so far.

THAT'S JAKI AND CHANTEL AND ME AND EDWARD, YOU GUYS!!!!

p.s. they're both supposed to have white scarf things, but for some reason i chose black for chantel's because i'm an idiot.

it might change, but DON'T WORRY! I'LL KEEP YOU UPDATED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111111

kinklez @ 2008-09-14T18:12:00

2008-09-14T23:13:32Z

edward, tessa and i are playing ddr.

and holy shit.

holy fucking shit i am tired.

p.s. edward and i probably won't get married until after i graduate college, BUT I WANT TO START PLANNING MY WEDDING!!!!!!!1111111

kinklez @ 2008-09-11T23:18:00

2008-09-12T04:29:26Z

yay my sociology class is cancelled for tomorrow.

i'm happy.

in other news, i feel like nothing is happening in my life, because if something was happening in my life i would have something interesting to update about. but i don't have something interesting to update about. i have fun in my everyday activities, but they are just everyday activities. what can i really update about.

i mean, right now i really just want to play the sims and learn how to make pretty custom content so i can make pretty unique sims hair. but the sims 3 comes out soon so what is the point of learning.

plus i probably couldn't learn anyway. plus i can't even figure out how to keygen photoshop so the one i had expired and ended up getting broken somehow.

:(!!!

for those of you who were wondering, edward got his hair cut and i was sitting in the salon and his hairstylist just came up to me and grabbed my hair and said "i absolutely love your hair. i've always wanted to get mine permed like that. i know yours is all natural. you're so lucky." and i was SO FLATTERED because she had gorgeous hair.

and oh. when i got my paycheck today there was a dresscode notice attached to it, which everyone got but i still feel like i'm being singled out. i follow the dresscode, the only thing i can see that they might not like is that my hair could be considered messy, because it says "hair must be neat and styled away from face" and mine isn't neat, because i don't brush it i just let it flop down where it lays. BUT IT LOOKS GOOD THAT WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111 the notice said that 90% of people were fine with the dresscode, but i just feel like everyone at county market hates me so. they must be addressing me.

GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!

ummm. i have a bump on my tongue. today i was in the bookstore and i was reading this book about different problems girls have with their bodies and there was a picture of a girl who just had fucking MILLIONS OF PIMPLES ON HER ASS and it was disgusting. it was nasty. i am so glad that i do not have buttne. i would much rather have cellulite than buttne. even if buttne eventually goes away.

i guess it's time to take my nightly shit and go to bed. i DO have school tomorrow. even though soc was cancelled. i'm going to my mommys house tomorrow. apparently i'm going to redye taylor's hair. last time i did it tessa's bathtub was black for weeks before my dad came over and scrubbed it out because taylor refused to. but we'll be doing it at my mom's house so we won't allow that to happen.

our apartment is always so messy, by the way. tessa and zach do the dishes a lot but still. it usually smells in the kitchen because of the amount of dishes we use. i really am considering paper plates and plastic utensils. but we already have so much garbage and so few garbage cans. mine and edward's room just has clothes all over the floor because when we wash clothes i am too lazy to hang them up so i keep them in the clothes basket, but eventually we just end up digging through it too the bottom and everything ends up on the floor.

i have to learn to be a better housewife.

i want to compile all of mine and edward's emails and publish them on lulu.com.

the end.

kinklez @ 2008-09-10T22:01:00

2008-09-11T03:01:41Z

edward and i went shopping and i made him get a pink shirt and it looks fucking sexy on him.

WHO EVER SAID THAT MEN SHOULDN'T WEAR PINK!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

kinklez @ 2008-09-09T23:44:00

2008-09-10T04:45:22Z

i was just reliving this conversation edward and i had together and i thought i'd share it with everyone.

kaity: wut r u doin lol
Edward: well not much now you know mom said i had to take out the garbage today and i was all i'm a grown man i dont have time i have a life and shes all but son it's piling up it'll take two seconds and i'm all i have to check my email mom geez
kaity: parents huh
Edward: yeah parents i mean whats there deal u know
kaity: yeah i know but im sure she cares about u if she didnt she wouldnt have given birth and stuff lol
Edward: i guess your right its just you can care and get out of my way at the same time you know
kaity: well yeah sure igues s but still she cares
kaity: i do 2 u no lol
Edward: you do since when
kaity: maybe a month a go or something *blushes*
Edward: i didnt know that why didnt you tell me afraid ill freak out? lol
kaity: yaeh somethin like that
Edward: but were buds we haev been for a while there wouldnt be any awkward things like that rofl
kaity: well i didnt know i mean but do you care about me or anything? i told my friends i was going to ask eventually but i didnt expect it to be today lol maybe its the hunter in me lol
Edward: i hunt can i be in you
kaity: lol sure lol anytime comparde
Edward: ur not an indian giver are you i dont like teasing ;)
kaity: indian wut
Edward: indian giver you know a person who gives somethiing and takes it back
kaity: oh no when i give something it stays given i'm always like i'm not going to take this back, you know in casual conversation
Edward: thats good to here haha
kaity: did i make it awkward or somethin lol
Edward: no of course not what makes you think that
kaity: i guess i just feel that way and it makes it seem like your mad that i like you or somethin
Edward: im not mad okay just relax
kaity: u r mad >< i knew it
Edward: im not mad okay i just have to snap sometimes you think you bother me and you dont and i dont like it okay
kaity: okies srry i wont do it anymore lol
Edward: its okay just sometimes i get really forceful and its like i c ant control my emotions you know its not your fault im just a bad guy
kaity: your not a bad guy its just you have emotions and i like that just as long as your emotions dont make black eyes on my face
Edward: i would never hit you why did you say that!
kaity: i dont know i was just wondering if you were that type a guy or wut but i guess ur not
Edward: i dont believe in hitting on women unless its my thighs pounding theres you know
kaity: yeah i know lol you can beat me anytime
Edward: i thought you didnt wnt me hitting you make up your mind o.O
kaity: no i meant like in the sexual way you said lol
Edward: what
kaity: The first indication of physical violence was your overactive temper, which I promptly confronted you with. You denied said deficiency and went on to apply sexual innuendo to relieve the stress of the situation. This is the cut-off point of the conversation thus far. I said, "kaity: yeah i know lol you can beat me anytime" indicating my willingness to particpate in a sexual activity with you since you implied that you were more than happy to beat the inner thighs of a woman as you aggressively rammed her vagina with your penis.
Edward: oh ok lol i understand i think i can come over tonight if you want
kaity: that sounds nice lol when
Edward: prolly in like thirty minutes lol
kaity: okk i have to clean up first lol messy lol so im going to go
Edward: okies bye
kaity: buy

edward doesn't really hunt, guys. don't judge him.

kinklez @ 2008-09-09T22:31:00

2008-09-10T03:32:17Z

i just want you all to know that if we get sucked up into a black hole tonight.

you will be missed.

kinklez @ 2008-09-08T23:13:00

2008-09-09T04:33:41Z

it just took me about 20 minutes to parallel park. i think i broke some headlights, but i finally finished parking. i'm about halfway into the street and it's going to be very difficult for other cars to get around me, but i was getting pissed off and i was paranoid that people were watching me so i just gave up and parked there, because i was too lazy to park way in the back of our stinking parking lot and walk to my apartment.

i'm usually good at parallel parking if i have edward standing outside the car telling me whether or not i'm going to hit the car behind me!!!!!11

i have to work tomorrow and i dread it and i have to wear my work uniform to school because i have to go straight from school to work and it sucks. i can't be late because i was late like 2 weeks ago because i overslept and they already hate me for having "limited availability."

edward and i are going to go shopping when he gets his next paycheck and i'm going to get a ~*~*~**~*~*~*~men's shirt*~*~**~*~ that i tried on at target. and edward is going to get a ~**~*~*~blazer~**~*~*~ or a ~**~*~*~sweatshirt*~*~**~ at kohls. but i don't like kohls because their fat people selection is for old fat people. not all fat people are old, kohls!!!!!111

GOODNIGHT!

kinklez @ 2008-09-06T23:09:00

2008-09-07T04:13:46Z

i hate when edward goes to work at night because there's just so many fucking. drunk people outside and they scare me. and i have to walk by them all alone when i come home from dropping edward off and i'm scared they're going to try and talk to me or something and i'm scared that they'll knock on my door at 2 in the morning and scare the shit out of me and what will i do. nothing. because i'm all alone and tessa isn't even here.

TESSA ISN'T EVEN HERE!!!

and it just so happens that somehow we live in the ONLY. BUILDING. that people party in front of. i don't even know how. before there were some guys living downstairs who always just decided to have a drunken barbeque in the middle of the night and they were so loud, and one time zach yelled "SHUT THE FUCK UP" out the window, to no effect. and then those guys moved out, AND GUESS WHO MOVED IN? some GIRLS who randomly decide to have drunken barbeques in the middle of the night. but don't worry, they invite their boyfriends.

so now i just hear tons of drunk people outside talking really loud and how am i supposed to sleep. i think they're fighting now because all i hear is "HEY, FUCKER. FUCKER. FUCK YOU FUCKER. FUCK. WHAT, BITCH. I'M GON' FUCK YOU UP, BITCH."

i hate drunk people. and just so everyone here knows, taylor thinks that alcohol is pronounced alc-LO-hol.

kinklez @ 2008-09-05T15:03:00

2008-09-05T20:09:58Z

i started college and so far it is boring. the only uplifting part is that my sociology teacher has a british accent and i just love listening to her talk and pretending that i'm at hogwarts.

there's this guy in my philosophy class who i just want to punch in the mouth. i hate people like him. he's all eager to share stories about himself to the class to try and impress everyone. like we were playing an icebreaker game. "raise your hand if..."

and one of the questions was "raise your hand if you've ever eaten something alive." and the guy was like "yeah.... i totally dropped acid and got lost in the woods ... and i ate like 30 different bugs."

and then one of the questions was "raise your hand if you've been attacked by a wild animal." and he said "yeah .... my friend and i totally got bum rushed by this one buck.. it broke a couple of my friends ribs.. i kicked it and it ran away.."

um, the question isn't who has FRIENDS who have gotten attacked by wild animals. GOD! and even if it was him who broke ribs in the incident, i don't give a rats ass. i hate people. it's okay if you raise your hand, and if the teacher asks you you say "i got attacked by a goose," or something, but don't try and outdo and impress everyone else because it makes me absolutely sick.

and then he'll go up to the teacher after class and be like, "do you know anything about metaphysics? who in the philosophy department can i talk to about alternate realities?" and i just cry. i want to murder him and all people like him.

anyway i must venture forth to my mother's house this eve. not really but i'm dropping tessa and zach off at culvers. so they can go there.

p.s. edward and i have -$39 in the bank and we have no idea how it happened. by our calculations we should have about $120. we really should have more but we are impulse spenders and eat out almost everyday. we have now vowed to save at least $350 a month. but i doubt that it will happen because we've made similar vows before.

kinklez @ 2008-08-29T22:19:00

2008-08-30T03:21:21Z

i'm a god-fearing, hard-working combine driver, hoggin' up the road on my p-p-p-p-plower, chugga-lugga-luggin' five miles an hour .........

ON MY INTERNATIONAL HARVESTER!!!!!!!!!11111111

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b52SDopaMZY

^_________________________________________~

kinklez @ 2008-08-21T22:02:00

2008-08-22T03:03:12Z

THEY ARE DELAYING HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF-BLOOD PRINCE UNTIL JULY 2009.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!111111111111111111

I WAS SO EXCITED.

kinklez @ 2008-08-19T18:19:00

2008-08-19T23:27:52Z

okay so regarding edward's job.

he went to orientation at his new job today, and IRONICALLY, his old job called and wanted to talk to him. because they wanted him to come back to work.

so he called them and told them that he already had another job, and they threatened him and pretty much said "if you don't work for us, you won't be a CNA anywhere."

pretty much.

they said that if he came back and worked for them, he could lie and say he had permission to use the tenants phone (she's out of her mind and doesn't even know what's going on), but if he decided to go and work at oakridge (his new job), they would report him and revoke his CNA license. which means that nowhere would hire you as a CNA, because usually when people get their licenses revoked it's for abuse or negligence.

SO. he talked to his new boss and told her what was going on, and his new boss said that they CAN'T revoke his license for something as lame as $1.82 phone charge, and that even if they did they'd still hire him as long as his background check came back clean, which it is. so he called his old job back and told them he was just going to take the new job because he didn't want to lie and he didn't want to work with people who were threatening/bullying him anyway. and they argued for a long time because his old boss was pissed off, but i guess now she's going to try and revoke his license so we don't even know what's going to happen.

ON THE PLUS SIDE, if he can keep his new job at oakridge, he's going to be making $10.00/hour, which is $2.00 more than he was making at harmony. i hate that he'll be working the night shift, but they said that there will be opportunities to switch shifts to 7am-3pm, and in 6 months he's eligible for benefits like health insurance and 401k, WHICH HARMONY NEVER OFFERED HIM EVEN THOUGH HE WAS FULL TIME!!!!!!!!!!11111111

so i'm happy. obviously him getting fired was a SIGN FROM GOD!11111

his orientation was only supposed to last an hour so i was just going to wait for him in the car, but it ended up taking 5 hours and i sat. in the car. for five hours. well, four, and then i went to the bookstore, but still. it was really hot. but i finished a book and i crocheted some stuff so it wasn't that bad. and i'm getting rewarded with chinese food and a footrub so i'm contented.

AND edward is going to paint my toenails tonight. salgmddjg.

kinklez @ 2008-08-18T13:08:00

2008-08-18T18:11:08Z

so recently, edward got fired from his job because he called me while he was at work.

he needed to tell me something, so he called me on a resident's phone for less than two minutes, and for some reason the phone got charged $1.82 so they fired him because "it's technically stealing."

so he just got a new job at a new place and now he has to work 11pm-7am and it sucks. it won't be TOOOOOO bad because i start school soon so he can just sleep while i'm at school and we'll still be able to see each other. but we won't be able to sleep together except on weekends so i'm pretty sad about that.

WHAT IF I HAVE A NIGHTMARE AND I AWAKE ALL ALONE? GOD!!!!!!!!11111

anyway i'm hungry bye.